There’s a common misconception about dating profiles that isn’t true:
“To weed out time-wasters, you should list exactly what you want on your profile so that anyone who isn’t interested in that life won’t contact you”
So women will write in their profiles, things like:
Looking for someone kind, interesting, who enjoys evenings out at the movies and <other thing you want>
Looking for a long-term relationship and good communication
Swipe left if you <something they don’t want>
And then they find that they STILL get messages from men who don’t want a committed relationship and who have characteristics they CLEARLY specified they didn’t want.
Cue frustration and the firm belief that “there are no good men online”
Here’s the thing: Making a list of what you don’t want doesn’t deter the wrong people from contacting you.
In fact, the men you don’t want don’t care what you put on your profile. If anything, you’ve given them a list of the lies they need to tell to convince you that they are right for you.
And on the flip side, a list of what you don’t want isn’t attractive to good men. Neither is a list of what they need to be to satisfy your requirements for a relationship.
Lists of requirements on a profile are an attempt to skip authentic self-expression and character judgment. And it doesn't’ work.
So what should go on your profile?
Your profile should clearly communicate who you are, your lifestyle - current and future, and a clear view of what a relationship with you will feel like.
Your dating profile should pulse with the energy of what life with you will look like.
That is what repels the time wasters and stops the scroll of the man who will be interested in YOU.
Are you an extrovert who spends 5 nights out of 7 out on the town? Your profile should express that. If it does, any homebodies will for skip your profile.
This will save you getting excited about someone, going on 2 first dates and then finding out that he only wants to “Netflix and chill” for the rest of the relationship.
Authentic self-expression and leading with your core values and mission are the key to attracting the man you want.
Evaluating and discerning character are the way to confirm that he is who he appears to be.
When you make these changes, the quality of your dating pipeline goes way up.
Creating a unique and powerful dating profile is one of the steps I deep dive into with my clients in my coaching practice.
If you’d like help shifting your dating process so that you are dating men who truly match you, schedule an appointment at this link: https://sadecurry.com/schedule-appointment
Real love and partnership is waiting for you.